Give me an international break...

Well we really have seen it all this week…new Arab money, crazy transfer dealings, shock manager “resignations” and some old bird getting the boys from Westlife tattooed across her back.

The world has almost certainly gone mad.

The week began as it normally does, with a Monday. With the transfer window just hours away from closure it was set to be a routine exercise. For many it was simply a case of one or two last minute deals to patch up holes in paperweight squads.

Then all of a sudden, up pop some crazy Arabs at Manchester City faster than it takes Mike Ashley to down a pint.

Out of nowhere, big money bids were being made for the likes of Berbatov, Torres and Robinho.

Of course the Torres bid as rebuffed, while United’s Dark Knight Sir Alex Ferguson turned up in his Batmobile at Manchester Airport to whisk the Bulgarian off to Old Trafford.

But why was Berbatov under Fergie’s blanket?

Was it the cold weather in Manchester? Or maybe some strange, cultish United initiation ceremony? Or perhaps the strongest analogy to date that when it comes to transfers, modern day footballers are treated like dogs- with the Bulgarian shoved in the boot of Fergie’s Bentley with nothing but a blanket and a squeaky toy….

…but if that were true the new number 9 would be sporting a flashy diamond encrusted collar by now.

Eventually after a long hard day for Sky Sports News reporters the deadline came and it was Brazilian star Robinho who joined the joined the world’s newest richest club.

I’m sure that for City fans the news is even more exciting than Frank Sinartra rising from the dead to bring in international sex-pot Sven Goran Eriksson as manager.

But for those, like me, who support clubs like Burnley in the Championship, the billionaire boys club the Premiership is quickly becoming is further evidence that the game has firmly become detached from its roots.

After Monday I did not feel joy at yet more money and promise of big name world stars in England…I felt quite sad, that the slim dream of the Clarets one day competing, albeit in the lower echelons of the top division, was now about as far fetched as an X-Factor sob story.

But can it work? Can City gatecrash the top four?

It will only make this new investment interesting if they can.

However I firmly believe any power shift cannot happen unless City can persuade a Fabregas, Ronaldo or Torres to switch allegiances from one of the big four to “Middle Eastlands.”

The day that happens is the day things start to hot up in the Premiership.

So Monday ended and Tuesday began…

…and with the dust still settling from the transfer window, something of Biblical proportions was about to happen.

The news came through on the wire…had the Messiah really been taken to the slaughter?

Report’s emerging from inside the dungeons of St James Park was that Kevin Keegan had gone.

Whether he’d resigned, been sacked or magically disappeared through the fog on the Tyne nobody knew.

It was utter frenzy…a state of confusion, fear and nausea loomed round the Toon.

Who do you call to solve such a mystery?

With Morse, Ironside and Scooby Doo and the Gang all unavailable, it was left up to those canny old hacks at Sky Sports.

And after 48 hours of fervent forensic analysis taking place it was eventually discovered that Keegan had in fact resigned stating differences over transfer policy.

And with that lovable rogue Dennis Wise in charge of the decision making in that department who can blame him.

Taking transfers decisions out of the hands of managers seems to be a trend in the modern day game.

And perhaps in some instances it may work, but if it was Ashley’s intention all along to employ a technical director then why bring back a man who’s prone to more fits of emotion than Elton John.

This saga only ever had one winner- and not for the first time, it wasn’t King Kev.

By employing Wise after stating Keegan was the man to take the club forward, Ashley may as well of pulled down Kevin’s trousers and spanked his bottom in the club shop window.

It was utter lunacy.

And Keegan is not the only lucky loser in all of this – spare a thought for the Geordie faithful.

They may think their bigger than they are but since Keegan took over there have been small glimpses of hope.

An up and down season may have been in order, but Keegan was beginning to build a team that on the occasional Saturday, as their opening day fixture against Man Utd proved, could perhaps upset the applecart.

There’s no doubt footballs lost one its genuine characters with Keegan’s departure, but you can’t help thinking it would have been better if Ashley picked a different replica shirt from one of his many sports shops and spent his money elsewhere.

Although to be frank, no club deserves to have their hero, their legend, their messiah made a mockery of right under their noses.

Will they revolt? Will they boycott the game or burn effigies of Ashley? Who knows…But one thinks for certain, there will be at least one extra spare seat in the home end on match days.

And as if we couldn’t take anymore…Alan Curbishley went from West Ham as well.

Poor old Alan, who’d established the greatest squad of permanently injured footballers on the planet resigned from his post on Wednesday.

Again transfer dealings were at the centre of the controversy. This time it was over the issue of George McCartney moving to Sunderland.

“Curbs” was apparently angry at the sale of one of his fitter players and decided enough was enough.

Is this going to be the new trend that comes with having the transfer window?

At the end of every business portal just how many casualities will we have?

It's just madness…it leaves me wondering what will happen come January?

Will Roy Keane resign after being told he Spurs don’t have any reserve players left for him to buy?

Will Mark Hughes resign after failing with a £700 million pound bid for Roque Santa Cruz?

Or will Paul Ince fall on his sword, realising that after signing Robbie Fowler- convincing the rest of the spice boys to give it one last go in the Premiership was a bad idea?

We will wait and see.

Well that brings us to the end of a rather frantic week in football.

And at the end of it, what could be better than an England World Cup Qualifier?

The joy…

SB